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angelguk · 5 years ago

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→ trial and error — a jeongguk scenario

member: jeon jeongguk

word count: 2.1k

genre: college!au + angst + best friends!au

warnings: nothing extreme folks just jk being kinda sad / vague mentions of past mental health issues / oc is an aries / love confessions / unrequited love

soundtracks: hand over hand, roland faunte + lvr boy, awfultune

The first time he felt it he was seventeen. It didn’t hit him quick or hard. Instead, it was slow, a gradual drifting of his heart closer and closer to you until he felt it fall right out of his chest and into your hands. He didn’t mind it, the fall. What hurt was that you didn’t know you held his heart. And within it the undying adoration he had for you, thumping painfully against his rib cage as if it was begging to be released. He knew it was love. There was no other word for it. It was there in the way his cheeks would burn whenever you smiled at him, there when you’d tackle him in the hallway with a hug and Jeongguk would feel his insides melt with giddiness, and there when you managed to coax a laugh out of him even on his bad days. There was no other word to describe the security he felt within your presence. Seen and loved and acknowledged. You listened when no else would, held him together when he felt like he was crumbling apart, tended at the bruises marring his heart. Jeongguk needed you like he needed oxygen. Even when you’d argue (usually over something trivial) he found himself crawling back to you. Ribbons intertwine your souls together, and Jeongguk has happily lost himself in the mess of them.

He thought you’d see it too one day. Thought you’d feel it in the way he held you, the way his gaze lingered on you. Instead, he watched you fall in love with everyone but him.

It was easy to subdue it in high school, observe the flowers you received from admirers on Valentine’s day with a bitter smile. He’d never had the courage to slip a note in your locker or hand you a bouquet of roses, too terrified he’d destroy the most important relationship in his life with the greed of his heart. So he swallowed the confessions on his tongue and trudged through life pretending the only person who he wanted to be with wasn’t you. Yet, somehow, it got a million times worse in university. There had barely been any barriers in your relationship but suddenly Jeongguk felt his walls appear. It’s kind of hard to act like everything is normal after walking in on your best friend (and the love of your life) getting rawed in the bathroom of a frat party. Jeongguk had laughed it off, of course. What else was he supposed to do? But did he seek out the prettiest girl in the party and fuck her just to get back at you mentally? Maybe. That’s his secret to tell.

And from there it had descended into a spiral of boy after boy climbing into your sheets, touching you in ways that Jeongguk can only dream of. It infuriates him, spiking a pit of jealousy in his soul that he didn’t know existed. Because what did you see in them that you didn’t see in Jeongguk? He knew you better than any of those brief flings. You’d been friends since that day on the playground when Jeongguk hadn’t been able to push himself on the swing so you’d volunteered to help him. Back then, you towered over Jeongguk, big enough to control the playground during recess with your domineering and direct mannerisms. He liked that you controlled the world around you, fearless with every sure step forward. Jeongguk had looked up to you then - both literally and in admiration. Then his growth sprout hit him and you had stayed under his chin despite the bizarre stretches you did every morning religiously. Yet, even as you aged together, the spark in you never went out. In fact, it shone brighter. So bright that sometimes you blinded Jeongguk with your fervour. But he liked it too much to ever flee from the glow of your orbit. You held him in place with the secret glances you share, the soft smiles you gave him after hours of being cooped up in his room, studying together for your respective majors. It’s the history that gives him hope; even though you still fall into bed with men Jeongguk thinks are beneath you and he still distracts himself with faceless girls who don’t hold a candle to your light.

But lately, he’s been seeing that light waver, flickering into a darkness he recognises. Even now, in the midst of your joint study session, Jeongguk has been silently observing you. He’s known you long enough to note that you’re frustrated. It’s evident in the subtle way your bottom lip stays caught between your teeth, gradually shifting rouge from the pressure you’re applying on it. Despite the concentration painted across your face, you stare at the journal article on your screen blankly. There’s a void in your gaze. And it provokes Jeongguk forward, stumbling off of his seat as his desk.

The mattress dips underneath the weight of his knees, but you don’t look up, hands automatically reaching for Jeongguk as he crawls into your lap. Your assignments get pushed to the side and you allow it because you’re both due for a break anyway. His curls feel soft underneath your fingertips, a result of the numerous times Jeongguk had persuaded you into rubbing jojoba oil onto his scalp. He smells good too – a scent you can’t put into any other word than comforting floating around you. For a moment, it abates the despondency that’s been slowly creeping up on you.

“You’re thinking,” Jeongguk says it firmly but tenderly like he’s wading through deep waters.

You make a noise of acknowledgement. “I am.”

“Care to share your thoughts?” He’s looking up at you imploringly, doe eyes wide enough to make you kneel over and comply with his request.

“I’m thinking about Minjae.” You feel him stiffen underneath you, but it’s a minute movement, one that passes swiftly. You can’t even pause to question Jeongguk’s reaction.

“Why?” But the question is spat out, oddly venomous. It ignites something in your blood. You’re already on the verge of tipping over the edge – frustrated from the lack of satisfaction in your relationships. Minjae was a cause of several headaches but lately, Jeongguk had been lingering at the back of your head, a fluttering thought that kept resurfacing despite your best efforts to keep it locked in its cage. But you’ll deal with that later, the heat in your tummy as Jeongguk shifts deeper into your hold a threat.

“He’s just…” You pause because it’s difficult to put into words. How do explain that you think your boyfriend was falling out of love with you. If you can even call him that. Minjae was someone who you carried about but your feelings never ran that deep. Not that you didn’t try and push them there. It felt like he was a placeholder most times. Or a bookmark until you finally got the courage to flick open to the page in life where you’re truly meant to be.

You dig your hands deeper into Jeongguk’s hair. You hate how he sighs into you, falling lax in your arms.

“He’s just what?” Jeongguk mumbles. There’s a hand stealing underneath the sheets you’d wrapped around your waist. His fingertips skip over skin, drawing swirls along your bare thigh. You hate the tingle that slips down your spine at the feeling of his warm hands on you.

“Not satisfying me,” You grumble, the scowl on your lips a consequence of the warmth the ebbs from your chest every time Jeongguk pushes himself into your space.

There’s a sigh escaping his lips, one that sounds oddly like relief.

“In what way?” He covers the sigh up with a false laugh. “Aren’t you guys, like, dating? Shouldn’t you tell your boyfriend that?”

“He’s not my boyfriend,” You retort. “And in every way. He doesn’t love me. I know that. He barely listens to me when we talk and he only calls me over when he wants to sleep with him. Last time we fucked he just focused on getting himself off and he rolled right off me and got on his phone.”

The intake of breath the slips through his teeth is sharp. “Fuck, really? I told you he wasn’t worth your time.”

“You say that about every guy I start seeing.” You glance down, surprised to find the gaze on Jeongguk’s face rather serious.

“That’s because none of them are worth your time. They don’t deserve you.” It’s said so resolutely that your heart flips in your chest. And just like that, the air around you feels different. It’s charged with the promise of a thousand whispered words. You hold his unwavering gaze, feel the stillness of the hand on your thigh with caution.

“Well, who deserves me then?”

Me, Jeongguk thinks. I know you better than any of them will. I’ve loved you more than any of them have.

He opens his mouth. Closes it. Stares at the ceiling. Hates the silence in the room. Abhors the hesitation in his heart. And then his gaze falters back to you.

You’re waiting, the patience in your eyes making his heart thump fast. He wonders if you can hear it, in the quiet that lingers between you. Because he can hear it. Can hear the words he wants to say so clearly in his mind. If only he had the balls to say them. To ask for more with you. That’s all he’s ever wanted. More. It’s just a flash, the image of you in his arms, your mouth on his. The idea of calling you his makes his head swim. It’s why he does it. It’s not a thought through action. Jeongguk always assumed his confession would be more than this – but it felt perfect at that moment, a clarity in his brain that drives him to shift upright, push right into your space.

It’s barely a kiss, just a graze of your mouth on his, but it zips through him. His lips burn with the print of your mouth, engraved in his memory for eternity now. But then he feels you gasp, draw anyway, the shock in your eyes plummeting his heart right into his gut.

“Jeongguk?” The rapid flicker in your eyes coupled with the heated gaze you’re giving him makes his stomach roll.

“Shit – sorry. Fuck, I didn’t mean to-”

“Well, why did you?” You bite. “You can’t – you can’t just do that.”

He’s never wanted life to have a rewind button more than now. “I know – I’m sorry I really fucking am. Please, just listen okay – listen to me.”

But you’re not. He’s never seen you move so fast, snatching up your things in one swift motion. Your textbook is tucked underneath your arm and your laptop is thrown right into your bag, the highlighters you’d stolen from Jeongguk’s desk a long time ago going right in after it. He tries to reach out for you, but the slight flinch you give at the touch of his hand on your arm makes him wilt right back into himself.

“I’m sorry, Y/N.” But you’re off his bed, searching for your shoes vehemently.

“Don’t, Jeongguk. Don’t. I just – I just don’t know why you would do this?” The strain in your voice is the final nail in his coffin. And when you twirl around, the fierceness in your glare makes him want to crawl into the depths of the Earth. “Why? Why would you do that?”

He knows why he did it. But he holds his tongue, afraid he’ll push you even further away.

His silence prompts a hard sigh from you. And then you turn, walking right out of his room. Jeongguk stares at your retreating back. Feels the slam of his door in his chest. Waits until he hears you bid Yoongi a rushed goodbye. And then he puts his head in his hands, falls back into the bed that’s still warm from the reminiscence of your body. Rakes his fingers through his hair, tugging hard like it could extract the memory of this event from his brain forever. He doesn’t cry though, despite the stinging in his eyes. But he feels it, every crack in his heart. It splits so deep it feels like its’ bleeding to him. Maybe that’s where his tears were; in the spilling of his heart inside his chest.

He says it because in the solace of his room no one is here to hear it. It would be nice, to just say it once. Without fear, he was destroying something he cherished so dearly. Well, he’s already ruined it. There is nothing to lose anymore. Not with the way you looked at him liked he’s betrayed you. And perhaps he had, but he couldn’t hold it in anymore. He couldn’t pretend to feel about you the way he did. Not like a friend. More than a friend.

“I did it because I like you,” Jeongguk says to the air. To the ache in his heart. “Because I love you.”

#jungkook x reader #jungkook angst #btswritingcafe #btswriterscollective #bts x reader #bts angst #jungkook scenario #jungkook fanfic

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acelikesturtles · 5 years ago

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“What’re You In For?”

Prompt: #22 (Two Miserable People at the same Wedding) - Raphael x Olivia

Warnings: Light Alcohol Mention, Cursing (duh, its Raphael)

Word Count: 1,568

A/N: This is from an ask game that I reblogged a couple days ago. It took me a while to finish editing it because I really and truly prefer quality of my work over quantity, plus I needed to find the right soundtrack for this so I could focus 110%. I hope you like it @headhalfling!

As much as Raphael cherished April as a friend and Casey as his “fourth brother”, he had despised almost every last moment of the last 8 hours. The tie around his neck was too tight and the suit that April requested be tailored to his exact measurements still felt like it was smothering him. When he had finished the first suit fitting at the lair he had figured that all it would take to break free from this prim and proper prison was a well-timed stretch. That is, until Leo had very gently patted him on the shoulder and reminded him that they were putting all these fancy trimmings on for April and Casey, and that after the "incident" at their engagement party, Raph would likely do better blending in.

Oh yeah, that.

As if the clothing and the standard wedding formalities weren't enough to bother Raph, he had promised April he would only have one glass of champagne after the last time. Out of respect (and maybe a fair deal of embarrassment) following the unforeseen events of the engagement party, he decided that it might be best to stay alert, especially since being a ninja and all doesn't really pay in hard cash. Or at least...not enough cash that could cover the fees associated with a professional carpet cleaner.

One finger lazily circled around the brim of his empty champagne glass. Amongst all the chatter in the room his eyes remained fixed on Casey and April. He couldn't tell if he was trying to read their lips and decipher whatever lovey-dovey conversation they were having or perhaps just trying to understand the ins and outs of the event in general. He couldn't really say that he'd ever felt in love, and maybe he was just being incredibly cynical, but this felt like a strange way to celebrate it; stuffy outfits and distant cousins you've only seen twice in your life didn't seem like a celebration of love or a union of two families but like a strange ritual that he couldn't quite wrap his mind around.

Just as his brain was finally translating something admittedly pretty juicy happening between the happy couple, someone shuffled past him and took a seat beside him, drawing his attention reluctantly away. She didn't seem to be paying him much attention, instead tapping away at her phone rather furiously with one hand while brushing stray strands of blue hair away from her eyes. A deep sigh escaped her lips as she set her phone face down on the table and grabbed the entirely unclaimed glass of champagne sitting in front of her place mat, then tapped her fingers rhythmically on the sides.

"What're you in for?" She said playfully then took a small sip from the glass.

He laughed, then leaned back in his chair. "Does 'best man' count?"

"Hey, sure, I'm not the police. Besides, I knew that already." Once again pushing her hair from her eyes, she crinkled her nose when she smiled. "You guys were, er, I guess--you are--kind of distinct. Kinda cool if you ask me."

She set the champagne glass back down, before gazing up at her new conversation partner. Her striking hazel eyes connected with his own and caused him pause for a moment. Again, full of surprises, she didn't seem to react in fear or shock so much as intrigue at his physical appearance. He couldn't say that this wasn't a first, all night long at both the engagement party and this reception he and his brothers had been getting unwarranted looks that definitely indicated the unspoken feelings of the person staring. This, however, was different. As for how, he wasn't quite sure, but for now he simply felt unusually awkward and unable to figure out what he was supposed to say next. Mikey was always the better one at socializing. It was in his blood. Raph on the other hand, despite all the time he had to learn, was about as good at talking to humans as a fish was at flying.

He glanced down at the name tag that had been so carefully placed in front of where she sat before taking a shot in the dark that maybe she was the table-mate that hadn't showed up yet. Awfully late for her to arrive now...but not impossible.

"Umm...are you Lorraine Bri-...Brinch-...you know what, fuck, not even trying to pronounce that."

"What?" She followed where his eyes led to the cutesy black and gold calligraphy neatly engraved on a piece of folded card stock. She frowned and shook her head. "No, that's not me. My name's Olivia. Does make me wonder who that is though, and why they didn't show up. Kind of disrespectful, to not even RSVP honestly."

"Well what about you?" Raph countered. As if he even cared about this random other woman's dignity when he didn't even know who she was beyond her impossible to pronounce last name. "I didn't see you until just now."

"I’ve been here,” she responded. She broke eye contact with Raph and began picking at the skin surrounding her fingernails. She had noticeably callused fingers which matched the overall aesthetic of her chipped and unpainted fingernails. “I just don’t really want to be here. I don't typically like stuffy events like this, as much as I'm really glad to see Casey and April together. These things make me anxious, and I would drive home, but that wouldn’t be cool because I’m the photographer’s ride." She gestured vaguely towards the woman in a pantsuit with long black hair that had been tirelessly capturing every last angle possible of the bride, groom, and bridal party.

"Hey, uh...me too." He answered. He was starting to feel anxious too seeing the way that she picked at her fingernails. “These events, they aren’t really for me. This tie ain’t doing it for me either, its kinda been choking me,” He gave her a small smile, hoping that it might ease her mind to have someone sympathize with her, even if it wasn’t entirely on the same page. Again, Mikey would’ve been better at this kind of thing than he was, but it helped that the connection between them was already sort of going well. Well, aside from him accusing her of being late to the wedding, that is.

Olivia’s eyes narrowed on his black and white striped tie. She pressed her lips together, holding back a smile while a short breathy laugh escaped her nostrils. “Well, there’s your problem. You tied it too tight, dummy. Here-”

Her callused hands reached up and began loosening the fabric fastened around his neck. Earlier when he had tied it himself he hadn’t bothered to ask for help, assuming that this was just how ties were supposed to feel, but the gradual feeling of relief that came with the freedom to move his neck like normal was ethereal. While she couldn’t fix the constricting fit of his suit, having the tie a little looser was already helping him feel more relaxed and adjusted. Their eyes locked again as she gently pulled her hands away from the satin, although this time something felt different. Like he was sweating. Everywhere.

With the relief of one discomfort came the creation of another. He cleared his throat.

“Thanks.”

“Hey, anytime, I learned how to tie those for a friend of mine a couple years ago. You should’ve asked for help from somebody sooner.”

Now he was beginning to feel really embarrassed. Did she think he was stupid? Or incapable of learning how to do normal human stuff like tying a goddamn tie? “Nah, they’re busy, didn’t wanna bother ‘em.” Now that made him at least seem noble.

“Well you weren’t bothering me.” She smiled and raised an eyebrow. “I doubt you would’ve bothered your brothers by asking for help, their ties don’t seem to be bothering them.

Fuck.

Still feeling sweaty, Raph shrugged and chuckled. “Awright, fine, then I’ll call you next time I gotta wear this damn thing, yeah?”

Once the words had escaped his mouth he realized how silly they must’ve sounded, but he didn’t take them back. He wasn’t an entirely socially inept fool, that was Donnie’s job. She paused for a moment at his words and began searching his eyes for an answer that he didn’t know he had in him. This was uncomfortable and sweaty and hot...but he kind of liked it. Raph swallowed and broke eye contact with her unceremoniously then twisted the watch on his left wrist back into center position.

“Maybe I will.”

Olivia reached into her silver crossbody that until now, had been closely kept by her side entirely untouched. She uncapped a black ballpoint ink pen and scribbled a string of numbers onto a blue sticky note that had already been lightly doodled on (likely during the ceremony) with rough sketches of motorcycles juxtaposed against delicate daisies and baby’s breath she had likely seen in April’s bouquet. She tore the sticky note off and nervously stuck it onto his placemat. With a quick swig of the rest of the champagne left in the glass she had claimed, she stood up from her chair and gave him one last smile before hurriedly heading off in the direction of her photographer friend, leaving Raph with more questions than he did answers.

Maybe this whole lovey-dovey shit wasn’t so dumb after all.

#prompt #although it was technically from an ask game but hey #tmnt #acelikesturtles #tmnt 2014 #tmnt 2016 #bayverse tmnt #authoring by ace

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maurine07 · 3 years ago

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HILDE SJAHSHHABAJEBSJ SCREAMING CRYING THROWING UP WTF!?!???!?! THIS WAS ABSOLUTELY PERFECT!!!!!! Literally everything I could’ve asked for and so much more! You ate this up, babe

And this is going to be very long and very incoherent so I’m very sorry

After reading this, all I can say is:

Now, Hilde… first of all, I’m so proud of you for finishing this and sharing it with us!!!! And I can assure you, you should be too because this is one of the best things I’ve ever read in my entire life. I always have high expectations when it comes to you and you never fail to exceed them, you’re just so freaking brilliant

Second of all, this was everything!!!!! I’m just going to get right into it and leave the rant for the very end

The sound of her name whizzes through the air like a bullet trying to reach her flesh, but Tiffany dodges it, too mesmerized by the breathtaking Boston skyline to trade the old friend for a willful shot in the heart.

This was the perfect intro for this. It’s very gripping and your writing is magnificent as always, it always leaves me speechless with how beautiful it is. The way you describe everything is just perfect

Knew. She knew him once. Or she never knew him at all.

Ahhh and the pain begins. I felt like someone stabbed me when I read this line.

Nonetheless, anyone with at least one operational brain cell could attest that Ethan Ramsey has no interest in material possessions. Whatever his reason for writing Into The Unknown was, it had nothing to do with money.

Okay, I’m really sorry for this one ‘cause it’s so random but all I could think of when I read this was Into The Unknown from the Frozen soundtrack and now it’s stuck in my mind

Of all the lives that needed saving, I couldn't save ours.

THIS LINE IS THE SOLE REASON OF MY EXISTENCE!!!! I live and breathe for this line!! From the very first moment I read it, I’ve been obsessing over it and that hasn’t changed. It’s so fucking beautiful and painful. You’re just so brilliant, Hilde

A wistful smile stretching across her face is a treachery of reason, but she can't stop it from spreading at the sight of him: stern and rigid, with edges as sharp as his jawline. Time might have been a pitiless mistress, but Ethan hasn't changed one bit—only a splash of grey in his mocha brown hair twinkles as a lasting testament to another year added to the score.

I’m losing it over silver fox Ethan and that wistful smile…

Tobias grins back, his smug expression inseparable from his cocky attitude. “I’m the whole package, darling. Why change something that’s already perfect?”

THERE HE IS!!!!! THE ONLY MAN EVER!!!! I got so excited over this part

“Your package could use some humility.” Tiffany quips, raising a brow.

“Humility doesn’t blend well with my charm.”

“You’d have to try it first to know for sure.”

I’m literally in love with him. Can I have him, please? Also their friendship>>>>>> I’m obsessed with the way you write them

But she’s always been a masterful actress, and Tobias has always lacked the instinct for precise observation.

I don’t know what it is about this line because it’s engraved in my mind forever now. It’s so fucking good, way too good

Though the comment provokes a flurry of interest demanding him to elaborate on the notion, she rolls her eyes. “It feels like I need more alcohol before engaging in a conversation with you, Tobias.”

Please I love her and her sass so much

“Some random guy?” Tobias clutches his chest theatrically. “You’re hurting my feelings, Morticia. I thought we were making progress here.”

I love him<3 I’m sorry, I’m just gonna keep repeating that

“The latter is all hearsay.” Ethan’s deep, smoky voice cuts through their banter.

HE’S HERE OMGGGGG!!!!!! I SCREAMED SO LOUD AT THIS PART!! Also, love how he’s still a sarcastic little shit

Tiffany’s eyes are instantly drawn to his, emerald and sapphire alight with matching intensity that puts the crystal chandelier above them to shame. The small, private smile these two old lovers share is charged with sentiment and trepidation neither of them tries to conceal.

I’M GONNA CRY WTH?????? WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO ME???? Firstly, the writing is *chef’s kiss*. Your talent ma’am!!! Second of all, THEM!!! The “that puts the crystal chandelier above them to shame”😭😭😭😭😭 and you can still feel the love and respect they have for each other

“You look good.” She blurts out, her spontaneous compliment lights up Ethan’s face with a mysterious smirk.

“You look better.”

STOP😭😭😭😭 why are you making me feel this much, Hilde???

This scene, the entire scene of them seeing each other again was perfect!!! It was charged with the perfect amount of emotion and love and pining.

Like a sandcastle swept by the tide, Tiffany's smile falters when her gaze meets battleship grey—cold and majestic, all but forgotten after years of recurring nightmares about the very same pair of eyes.

YOUR 👏 WRITING 👏 I applaud you, Miss Hilde.l, I really really do. It’s so beautiful❤️❤️

“No business other than curiosity.” Gia declares, the intention behind her playful smirk unfamiliar. “I was wondering what you’re like. He was obsessed with you when he wasn’t working. Such a fascinating man, huh?”

Alexa play Pacify Her by Melanie Martinez.

Thousands tiny splinters of the past hit Tiffany at once, cutting through her flesh. Her mouth falls open in horror, entire body freezes on the spot as the sanity leaves her, completely unnoticed.

Again, I’m sorry for being repetitive but your writing is just too good for me not to comment on. HOW FO YOU DO THIS???? Teach me your ways, please. Also, because of good your writing is, I can feel how Tiffany is feeling, the internal turmoil going inside her

Tobias is watching the scene from afar, and though he has no goddamn clue what petrified Tiffany, he suspects that his best friend must’ve been involved. Before he makes sense of the mess unfolding in front of him, Doctor Addams is already on her way to the exit.

Tobias rn:

Tears blur Tiffany’s vision the second she’s outside the building and within seconds, a waterfall begins to rain down her skin despite her best effort to block it out. She feels pathetic for grasping at the scraps of the reverie that brought her back to him. She knew that preserving a fickle illusion was a mistake, but apparently she had to let her silly little heart shatter again to realize just how disastrous.

My poor baby, I just wanna hug her and tell her to just forget him and come date me instead because I would treat her so much better. Again, the way you describe her feelings makes me feel exactly what she’s feeling and it hurts. Woman it hurts so bad, have some mercy

The next thing that follows seems to be just another delusion: her name drifts in the air like an arrow, almost stopping her dead.

“her name drifts in the air like an arrow, almost stopping her dead.” Is such a beautiful line and very painful at the same time (which seems to be your speciality, Hilde and I’m not complaining…okay, maybe a teeny tiny bit)

He’s taken aback by a cascade of heavy tears and mascara falling down her alabaster cheeks violently. This miserable occasion marks the first time she’s cried in front of him and the sight pierces him as deep as her words when Tiffany’s voice manages to rise over her muted sobbing.

TAKEN ABACK??? WHAT DID HE THINK WAS GONNA HAPPEN???

“For fuck’s sake, Tiffany, what the hell are you talking about?”

Men, I swear🙄🙄

“We could drive to my apartment.” He offers, his candid voice giving no sign of the internal struggle.

“Fine.”

MY VOCAL CORDS ARE TIRED OF ME AT THIS POINT (they actually hurt...anyways) I GOT SO EXCITED AT THIS PART!!!!! But then I remember that they’re gonna have to confront each other and I got a little scared

“I’ve been sober for five months. Having liquor around isn’t safe.”

“I was in rehab twice.”

Considering the ending of Contaminated, I’m so happy and proud of him!!!

The vastness of her dismay broadcasts in her glossy eyes and parted lips almost too frightened to utter a sound. A long, quiet moment later, a barely audible whisper breaks through. “Do you think that…Maybe if you didn’t…”

The way she blames herself :(((((

“I’m doing my best.” Ethan’s weak, stilted smile offers no reassurance as the silent horrors of his struggle gnaw at Tiffany. “It has to suffice.”

I’m not okay… I really felt for Ethan here. The man is really trying his best and I mean, we’ve all been there.

„You let me go years ago.” She swiftly schools her features and sneaks a furtive glance at Ethan, her studied numbness convincing enough to stir his blood. “I was never yours to begin with.”

“I wanted you to be mine.” He asserts with a sigh. “I still do. I always do.”

I’m in unspeakable pain right now and it’s all your fault, you should feel really bad, Hilde because this is too much. Also, you’re paying for my therapy

he decides to express his mounting frustration, firing another question like a missile aimed at her heart.

“Are you happy, Tiffany?”

AND THERE IT IS!!!!!!!!!

“I have everything I could possibly need.” Dewy-eyed, she repeats the sentence through gritted teeth.

Oh no, baby… the way she’s trying to convince herself. I just want her to be happy, WHY CAN’T SHE BE HAPPY??

The series of questions makes her snap. She turns around, looking daggers at Ethan, her lip quivers as she fumes. “Spare me the therapy session and save your talents for someone who actually needs your fucking charity.”

The way she snapped at him!!!! I mean, he was the one who was pushing her

“He’s not you.”

I. AM. DEAD!!!!!!!! SOMEONE SEND HELP I CANNOT FUCKING BREATHE RIGHT NOWI AM ACTUALLY HYPERVENTILATING I CANNOT—

Ethan reaches out to her face tentatively, afraid she’s going to shatter. His touch is given unspoken permission and the gentlest brush of his fingertips follows up and down her cheeks, her neck, across her jaw, before he tilts her chin up, forcing Tiffany to look him in the eye.

Unsure who moved first, the distance shrinks even further—their faces merely inches apart now, the dizzying closeness and hot, heavy breaths inviting them even closer.

With extreme caution, Ethan’s lips brush the corners of her eyes, kissing the tears away. She doesn’t protest, doesn’t move, doesn’t even breathe for a good second. His feather-light kisses trail down until their lips meet at last, gliding over each other ever so slightly.

YES YES YES YESSSSSSSSSSSS IM SOBBING THIS IS EVERYTHING!!!!!!!! I was literally holding my breath while reading this part. You could feel the amount of tension between them and it’s amazing how you could convey so much through words

The dainty brush fulfilling the long-held dream makes the dam burst, their emotions threatening to overflow when their lips connect in a bruising kiss—salty and sweet, lipstick mixed with tears, pulling them into a crushing embrace.

Starved tongues and hands join them with reckless abandon as the kiss deepens, their hearts screaming louder than the scars they’re used to hide.

Same thing here. You can feel the tension, the passion they have for each other, the love, the built up pining and longing. I’m just so in awe of you, Hilde, you’re so amazing

Like a sinner seeking repentance, he drops to his knees, resting his forehead against her belly with hungry, penitent lips planting fervent kisses wherever they reach. His careful hands thread through the layers of her dress, hiking the material up for Tiffany to drape it around her waist.

Hello????? This is sheer perfection!!! I’ve missed your smut so much, my dear (I say this as if I don’t constantly reread your smut at every minor inconvenience lol) but reading this was an experience, and a very pleasant one, I promise. Also, that first line has such a hold on me

“Can I taste you?” His voice trembles much like her entire body.

SIR I— Hilde, you can’t just drop things like this and expect me to function properly after this

An incredibly rare, wide smile breaks through, lighting Ethan’s face up as his thrusts become slower, more relaxed because he’s finally home.

He’s been lost, but he’s home now.

I feel everything and nothing all at once. Please send help because I can’t do this anymore. This part actually made me ugly cry. It’s so beautiful and so deep and filled with so much emotion. You’re an enigma, my dearest Hilde, the way you come up with things like this will always have in in such awe of you

No past, no future, just two lovers seeking reunion instead of definitive closure.

Just so beautiful, I’m in love with this line<3333

Ethan gulps at the question. The blurry memory of the night he reached his rock bottom clouds his features.

Unrelated but there is not a day that goes by that I don’t think about that scene

“It’s okay.” She whispers as she presses Ethan’s palm to her lips, peppering the damaged skin with a series of lingering kisses. “You can tell me whenever you’re ready.”

I love how she’s so patient with him, so loving and caring❤️❤️

Dumbstruck, Tiffany raises her brows and snorts with laughter. “No, you’re not.”

I LOVE HERRRRR

Her wickedly bittersweet smile feels like a punch when she looks him in the eye again. “But how could I when my heart was still bleeding for you?”

I am no longer alive, this is my ghost currently typing. THIS LINEEEEE

In a surge of sympathy, Ethan twines his hand with Tiffany’s, placing a loving kiss on each of her knuckles.

This part is so soft and sweet and precious. I love tender moments like these between them

“I am. I wasn’t ready then, but I’ve learned my lesson. I am ready now. I want to be with you.”

I’m so glad they both had time to grow and reflect on everything before giving it another shot. Hopefully he doesn’t pull another dumb move again

“I don’t have to drag you out of some shitty bar, do I?”

I love how he cares for Ethan…in his own Tobias way ig

“She’s a married woman, Ramsey, don’t you have any shame?” The fake reproof in Tobias’ voice is immediately overshadowed by a wolf whistle that makes Tiffany dive under the blanket. “Just kidding, I orchestrated this. Play it safe, buddy.”

Have I mentioned that I love this man???? Because I do, so much

Maybe moving on is accepting that some things are meant to be broken, and some other are worth fighting for until the very last breath. Maybe it’s learning to differentiate between the two.

This part has to be one of my favorite things I’ve ever read in literature ever. It’s so so freaking beautiful and has such a deep meaning. The way you worded it is absolutely magnificent and perfect and I just love the way you showcased this part all throughout the three parts of this incredible series. You’re a mastermind and I will never shut up about it

This is real.

THEY’RE HAPPY AND I’M HAPPY!!!!!! This was the perfect way to end this spectacular series

Hilde, my dearest sweetest Hilde, I honestly have no words for this, genuinely. I really wish I could put into words how I feel right now but I can’t. I loved seeing E&T’s journey, the way they grew and developed, how even despite all the hardships they went through they still love each other so much. This part was the perfect ending to this series in every way, shape and form. I love the scene where they reunite, I could visualize everything so vividly in my mind. I love their confrontation, how no matter how much they try to avoid it, they always make their way back to each other. The smut was absolutely fantastic. It was equal parts hot and sweet and tender and passionate. And the talk they had after made my heart melt, I had the biggest smile on my face towards the end. You have no idea how happy I am that they’re happy. I love them so much❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

Also, you have no idea how much this series means to me. It’s so hard saying goodbye to it but I’m also really relieved that they finally have their happy ending. This series will always have a very special place in my heart, no matter what. Thank you so much, Hilde for creating this wonderful series and sharing it with us. I’m forever grateful for you, your writing and for E&T

Well, that got sappy real quick (but this is me we’re talking about, are we really surprised it got sappy?) I’m so sorry if this seems messy or incoherent, I’m just feeling a lot at once and it’s 2 am and I’m really sleep deprived lol. Anyways, I loved this so so much, more than words could ever express and I love E&T even more. Love you so much, Hilde and I hope you have the most amazing day ever❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

Compound Fracture - Ethan Ramsey x MC

Tiffany and Ethan meet again, joined by the ghosts of their past.

Conclusion to my Drunk Lord Ethan AU aka Tiffany finds out about Ethan’s drunken encounter whilst in the Amazon AU.

Rating/Category: Explicit (+18) / mini series, completed

Warnings: language, mention of alcoholism, explicit adult content (the short explicit part is separated by red tape if you’d wish to skip it)

Author’s note: I’m waving my problematic fav goodbye with tears streaming down my face. Huge thanks to everyone who followed us on this painful journey! Your wonderful support brought us here and I’m immensely grateful for every comment and message ❤️

Without further ado, I invite you for the messy last ride through this Angst Town!

____

“Doctor Addams?”

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ao3porcelainstorm · 4 years ago

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poison ivy & stinging nettles 18

On Ao3

Pairing: Sherlock/OFC

Rated: M

Warnings: eventual violence, torture, swears, adult themes (no explicit smut)

Chapter 17 - Chapter 19

Chapter 18- Monster

~~~

“That night he caged her, bruised and broke her.

He struggled closer, then he stole her.

Violet wrists and then her ankles, silent pain.

Then he slowly saw their nightmares were his dreams.

Monster- how should I feel?

Creatures lie here, looking through the windows.

Monster- how should I feel?

Turn the sheets down, let her ears be pillow lace.

There's bathtubs full of glow flies.

Bathe in kerosene. Their words tattooed in his veins.”

-Monster (by Meg & Dia)

~~~

Needless to say, Amelia was puzzled when she woke up in the softest bed she’d ever been in, to the sound of frantic knocking on a door.

Blinking into the unfamiliar space, she stood up, rubbing at her eyes, locating the source of the noise without too much trouble.

It was rather obnoxious, after all.

She opened the door slightly, peeking through the crack into an ornate hallway.

A hotel? Amelia looked over her shoulder into the room she’d trekked through.

When had she checked into a hotel?

The door was thrown open violently, a barrage of armed men barreling into the space. A hand caught her arm and pulled her into the hallway.

Spinning into the hall, a pair of hands clasped her shoulders and held her firmly in place.

“You’re safe,” Sherlock’s voice promised her.

“What?” Amelia wasn’t sure she’d heard him right.

Of course, she was safe. Why wouldn’t she have been safe?

Everything was dizzying. She didn’t understand what was going on. Why was everyone moving around so quickly? Why did her friends look so exhausted?

“Are you okay?” John’s voice was next. Fingers prodded her face, grey eyes glanced her over.

This felt overkill.

Her hands strayed to her sides, running down high-quality silk. Pajamas?

More armed agents, more voices joining the chorus in the hall, scouring the premises.

She voiced her thoughts to Sherlock, whose expression soured when he asked her to repeat herself.

“Mia,” John‘s tone was gentler. He guided her to a quieter section of the hallway, Sherlock hovering over his shoulder, that pained expression etched into his face. “What’s the date today?”

That was a silly question, she mused, pausing to consider her answer.

It was winter, wasn’t it? Christmas.

She relayed as much to the pair, and the men exchanged an uneasy look.

“It’s mid-January,” Sherlock croaked out.

“What?” a laugh was on her lips. “That’s what... off a month? You’re messing with me, right?”

“We didn’t celebrate Christmas,” John continued, watching her carefully. He was waiting for something that Amelia didn’t quite understand. He looked worried. Tense.

“Did I drink too much and ruin something last night? This has to be a trick,” she paused, watching one of the armed agents walk back into the hall and mutter something into a walkie-talkie.

“Sherlock.” Someone peered out of the room and gestured for Sherlock to come inside.

Mycroft? Amelia’s brain registered hazily. She did feel a bit out of sorts like she’d been at some party all night and was in the middle of sleeping off a hangover.

Sherlock studied at her briefly, then joined his brother without a second glance.

What was his deal? Why the sudden chill?

Something was wrong. Something was wrong. Her mind screamed in warning, over and over, there was another chirp of walkie-talkies and it felt like the room was closing in on her.

“John,” Amelia looked to him with wide eyes, her hand moving to grab his desperately. “Please tell me what the hell is going on.”

She clutched onto his hand, squeezing it until his fingers were white, listening to him slowly explain.

“That’s-,” her voice cracked. “That’s impossible…?”

She felt sick.

Her fingers went to nervous pick at the edge of her clothes, when she realized that someone had changed her out of the festive sweater and pea coat she’d been wearing on Christmas Eve.

Into silk pajamas.

“Oh my god,” she whispered, sliding down the wall and burying her face in her knees. “Oh my god.”

She kept repeating those three words, shaking her head in disbelief.

John set his jacket around her shoulders and sat with her, pulling her against his shoulder and muttering assurances until Sherlock returned.

“Hospital,” the detective grunted, his face a little more flushed than it’d been when he left.

It was a literal nightmare.

Question after question. First from Lestrade, then Sherlock, then Mycroft.

Over and over. Always the same answer.

She didn’t know.

Nurses floated around, sterile equipment and beeping machines in her peripheral; the soundtrack to her rising madness.

For her part, Amelia had done pretty well until the nurse helped her change into a hospital gown.

Written in thick black marker on her stomach was the word: “Surprise”.

Fortunately, the nurse had a bucket in hand before Amelia could vomit into her lap.

She stared at her reflection for what felt like an eternity, waiting for everyone to have their turn looking at the words, taking pictures, asking more pointless questions.

There were a few healing bruises near her rib cage. A few cuts, nothing too serious.

No physical signs of sexual assault. Thank god.

The primary focus fell on the violent cuts and bruises around her wrists and ankles.

Those were fresh. Indicative of a struggle. Bindings against her will.

The whole time, between interrogations or examinations, Amelia lay in her hospital bed and tried to will any explanation of her lost time.

Jim Moriarty. Sherlock had hissed his name like a curse a few times that day.

John tried to avoid saying it when he talked to her.

He’d done something. He did something to her mind and she hated herself for not knowing what. She’d never felt more violated.

Her skin crawled as if he had manifested into some parasite that was waiting to strike.

She was discharged after nearly six hours of tests and observation. Largely she was healthy.

No present drugs in her system, though the blood work would be analyzed by the next morning to determine any long term exposure. No broken bones. No malnourishment. Aside from instructions to keep her wrists clean and bandaged, she was given a clean bill of physical health.

Returning to Baker Street felt like a dream.

Her room was exactly as she’d left it- wrapped gifts scattered throughout the room. Piles of clothes kicked to the side, her bed unmade.

Sherlock disappeared upstairs while John helped her settle in, tiding the space while she changed into a pair of sweats and an old shirt. He offered to stay with her, but Amelia needed to listen to the thoughts she’d been shoving back.

When she finally convinced John to leave her be, she stood in the center of the room, just staring at everything around her, trying to collect her bearings.

She could recall Christmas Eve.

Mrs. Hudson sending her off to the store for an onion. She remembered the queue and the email from her friend in New York, the excited voicemail… and then nothing until that morning.

Dizzy, Amelia moved to her bed, grabbing a pillow and screaming as loud as she could into the fluff. She screamed and screamed until her body shook and she couldn’t breathe. Dropping the pillow to the floor, the breathing turned into sobs where she buried her face in her hand.

Choked up sobs turned to dry heaving, with her using to her hang her head over a trash can.

She sat pathetically on the floor of her basement room, her body completely numb to the chill setting into her bones.

This was a cumulation of every terrible anxiety that had ever passed her mind.

Every nervous glance over her shoulder, every time she jumped when a door closed or a car honked. All built up into some horrible monstrosity that she couldn’t even remember.

She didn’t hear the tentative knock on her door or the soft footfalls that stopped next to her.

“I suppose you don’t want any tea?” Sherlock asked sheepishly. When she didn’t answer, he set the mug he’d brought on her desk and moved onto the floor next to her.

He pulled his legs up, being careful not to touch her.

There was a pause, both Amelia and Sherlock froze, uncertain of what to say.

What was there to say? This was the cruelest form of torture.

She opened her mouth and closed it a few times, desperate to fill the air with some idle chatter, but the words wouldn’t come up. What was the point? Eyes searching the room, they fell on one of the delicately wrapped gifts by her feet.

Amelia leaned forward and plucked it out of the discard pile on the floor. Something else to talk about.

Heavens, she had no idea how much she needed that right now.

“This one was yours,” she stated, handing him the small parcel. “You can open it, if you want.”

It was a small box, no larger than the palm of his hand. When he hesitated, Amelia did her best to give him a reassuring smile but ended up just reaching forward and pulling the ribbon off of the top for him.

He pulled the wrapping paper free, revealing a small brown leather case.

“Go on,” she urged impatiently, her voice still raspy from her outburst. If she couldn’t be happy, dammit someone else would be.

Opening the box, Sherlock found a pair of cuff links, his initials S and H engraved on each one.

“The edges are the really cool part,” she explained, lifting one of the pieces with shaky fingers. “I managed to track down a collector who had some of Mozart’s broken violin strings.”

His eyes widened.

“His father kept a number of mementos,” she ran a finger over the thin material lining the cuff link. “Most of the major museums have what they need, this was something extra from a private collection... he sold me a few centimeters of a particularly worn one, but it worked.”

“This is...” Sherlock Holmes was at a loss for words. A rare phenomenon.

Amelia felt her chest tighten again. Stupid idea. She was an idiot. This wasn’t going to work.

She still felt terrible.

“Awful timing, I’m sorry-,” she wiped at her eyes.

“Stop apologizing,” he scolded, taking the hand with the cuff link into his. “This is one of the most thoughtful gifts anyone has ever given me. Thank you.”

“I wish we could have done this on Christmas,” she mumbled, pulling her hand free. She replaced the link into the box. “Nothing feels real anymore. I feel like I’m just floating.”

“Shall I find the Santa hat?” he offered, earning a small chuckle from his companion. “We can have a do-over. I’ll have Mrs. Hudson find the boxes with the decorations again.”

“Maybe someone tucked the last few weeks of memories into the boxes as well,” she muttered, leaning her head against the wall with a sigh. “Can you find those for me?”

It was meant as a joke, a little dry humor to try and cheer herself up, but Sherlock looked to her with the utmost seriousness.

“I have every intention to do so,” he assured her earnestly.

There was something about it that sent Amelia's heart hammering against her chest. She couldn’t figure out if it was his tone or the way he so openly wore his feelings in front of her, a rare sight indeed.

Something had changed within him during the last month, and it was abundantly clear to her at that moment that something had everything to do with her.

“It’s late,” she found herself saying. Old routines. Old habits. Lecture him to bed.

Safe habits. Safe routines.

“You should get some sleep,” she continued, standing up and offering her hand to him.

“I’m not sleeping tonight,” he replied quietly.

“And why not?” she tried to look firm, but fell short, instead deciding to cross her arms over her chest in an attempt to look stern.

“Are you?” he challenged back.

“That doesn’t matter,” she dismissed him. “You’re the super detective who needs to figure this out. You need your brain at full capacity.”

“I will,” he brushed past her, shaking out the covers on her bed and fluffing a few pillows. He dropped down at the far side, looking up at her expectantly. “Sit.”

Rolling her eyes, Amelia plodded over, make a show of crawling under the covers.

“Shall I read you a bedtime story?” he offered and Amelia wasn’t sure if he was being serious or not. The small smirk that emerged at her bewildered look had her roll her eyes.

“Oh shut up,” she snorted, turning to her side. “Do you plan to sit there all night?”

He shrugged, lifting the blankets and sliding his feet under.

“If need be,” he replied, looking to her side table stack of novels. “Have you any good books?”

It was so surreal. Sherlock so easily falling into place in her little corner of the universe.

He plucked Pride and Prejudice out of the stack, gently tucking his gift next to the pile. Flipping through the first few pages, he looked down at her and smirked.

“It is a truth universally acknowledged-,” he started before Amelia swatted at his hand.

“You’re not actually going to do this, are you?” she asked through a giggle.

“Depends, will it cheer you up?” he asked.

“Exponentially,” she grinned. “It’s always been a dream of mine to have the book read by an eloquent British gentleman.”

“Just call me Mr. Darcy,” he teased, returning his focus on the book. “Now, shush.”

~~~

Sherlock didn’t have a word for it, not yet, at least.

That feeling in his chest when Amelia curled up against him in her sleep.

The overwhelming wave he’d felt when she’d opened the door to the hotel room, after a full day of tricks and fake outs.

It wasn’t just relief at her being home. He’d been relieved when he’d saved John on numerous occasions. He’d been relieved when Irene confirmed she was still alive.

This was something else.

Something that penetrated far deeper than anything he’d felt for a platonic friend. John would call it something sentimental and sappy; love.

Sherlock held his breath when Amelia stirred. She repositioned, her back tucked against him, humming contentedly back to sleep.

It also didn’t help that he was decidedly attracted to her on a physical level.

Adjusting his pajama bottoms, he fell back into his thoughts.

He knew that Moriarty had an end game with all of this.

The madman had tried to distract him from solving the case by abducting Amelia, but when that hadn’t worked... he just gave her back?

No. It didn’t make sense. Not with the video and photograph he’d sent.

This was intentional. Moriarty intended to strike and whatever he put in her mind would inevitably rear its ugly head.

He leaned forward, wrapping a tentative arm around her torso, his face pressed in her hair.

It smelled all wrong. Sterile and not at all like the floral soaps she liked to use. Plus it’d been straightened and pulled into a braid, not the unruly mess of auburn curls that framed her face like a halo. All wrong.

It also implied that someone had taken the time to ensure she’d been washed.

He just hoped it was of her own doing.

God, for her sake he hoped a lot of things hadn’t happened to her.

Sherlock had promised to try and find the lost memories for her, but what if the truth was uglier than anyone could handle? Could he reveal what he found at the risk of hurting her again?

She had such a soft heart. He thought about the cuff links she’d taken the time to have customized. Mozart’s string. Of course, there was no proof, though Amelia was the type to try and track down someone reputable, the thought alone was enough to send Sherlock’s heart hammering against his sternum.

No one looked at him the way she did or listened intently as he rambled through theories on cases out loud. She always made sure he was safe after an altercation with a suspect, lecturing him to sit down and wait while she cleaned his wounds.

He couldn’t imagine a life without her smile and bright-eyed excitement. She saw so much beauty in the ordinary- ordinary people, ordinary places. Hell, she could take a flower and turn it into a masterpiece.

Perhaps that’s what she’d done to him? Pulled the most beautiful colors from him forward.

Oh.

He did love her, didn’t he?

And not that cliché, over the top, romantic movie love- no- this was something fuller, brighter, deeper. This was- intimate secrets whispered over tea in the middle of the night- love.

This was- holding her through the night to scare off the demons- love.

Sherlock had never felt this way before. He’d never been attached to another person like this.

It was terrifying. It was exciting. Part of him wanted to run upstairs and ask John all about it, and pretend to be annoyed when the doctor smirked and said “I told you so”.

Even so, there was a voice that reminded him to keep his head straight. That he didn’t get to enjoy this like someone normal.

Moriarty knew and wanted to exploit this vulnerability for fun.

Amelia rolled to face him. His arm was still hanging over her waist when she opened her eyes and smiled sleepily up at him.

Tilting toward her, he pressed a soft kiss to her forehead, sending her back to a peaceful sleep.

Closing his eyes briefly, the message Mycroft had shown him on the bathroom mirror of the hotel flashed before him.

Written in what Mycroft later confirmed was Amelia's blood.

"Wear your rue with a difference, Sherlock Holmes."

To hell with that.

Sherlock would burn the city down before letting Moriarty have his way.

Chapter 19

#sherlock #sherlock holmes #sherlock fanfiction #sherlock fanfic #sherlock original female character #sherlock/OFC #sherlock/OC #sherlock/reader #OC #OFC #john watson #watson #writing #fanfiction #fanfic #sherlock bbc

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ponyvsthebottle · 7 years ago

Note

2, 6, 9, 12, 18, 22, 32, 36

2: Has an anime ever made you cry? Hmmmmmmm HMMMMMMMMMMMM on one hand I am cool and tough and have historically never cried, ever, but on the other hand I'm pretty basic and got misty over the usual stuff i.e. Bye Bye Hachikuji, Ha Ha All His Actual Girlfriends Have Come To Your Concert To Shit On Your Life, when Ash fucking died in the first Pokemon movie, you know. Honorable mention to Robotics;notes when they throw the best character off of a cliff. I had to get up and walk around for a bit, but I think on the whole I was more mad than I was sad.

6: List your top 5 anime OSTs The Noir OST is my first love and is all the music that you need to drive fast at night or in the rain. The ONE shortcoming it has is that it doesn't have "Movement for Elevator Doors Open and You Shoot the Yakuza", which is what I bought it for. Uhhh fuckin Utamonogatari gimme those OPs for all of the monogatari seasons before Hana that's some good shit but it is missing (everything after Hana). I would like the Kizu OST IF I COULD FIND IT The Kill la Kill soundtrack was great I'll own it up I know it's #problematic but the music was fuckin hype and I'll never apologize for that. Ghost in the Shell: Standalone Complex has some bangers in it, everybody thinks "Christmas in the Silent Forest" is great but turns out that on the third record, "Dear John" is the TRUE banger Aaand FLCL? Let's say FLCL. The best one is "Stalker goes to Babylon" and I will hear NO DISSENT on this.

9: Name an anime character you absolutely hate Uhhh it is hard because I don't have hate in my heart I think??? I keep thinking of shows and characters and I'm like "well, I guess I don't hate this person, I just like them less." Uhhh I guess Kanetsugu? The fat kid who shows up close to the end of Masamune's Revenge. I understand with a ~romansuu~ you gotta inject that rival in there to break the deadlock, but I just resented him a lot more than I thought I would.

12: What is your favorite romance anime? The World God Only Knows. It's pretty good! I also uh I don't think technically I watch many romance animes because I am an emotionally-stunted monster, ya dig. I guess www.Waganaria as my backup but it was mostly a gag anime so uh take that as you will I guess.

18: What is your favorite drama anime? Uhhhh Eccentric Family? I'm not 100% on how to define "drama" but Eccentric Family is this kind of gentle river about family and friends and every so often everything just turns into a explosive crisis where the bonds between people are the true strength ya dig?

: Why didn't you pick *monogatari for either of those. I have no idea what to class *monogatari my man, I feel like it's a series of dialogues and monologues with occasional amazing fights. You could call it a romance or a drama! Then it would be my favorite, I think. I'm excited for Owari part 2

22: You get to have a harem of [6] anime characters of your choice, who do you choose? This question got SURPRISINGLY HARD but I think I've pulled together a list that is pretty good and representative and also hopefully nobody will call me a predator for any of these names. That's why post-apocalypse Hachikuji ain't on the list, btw. NUMBER ONE IS IZUKO GAEN OUTTA *MONOGATARI BECAUSE IF YOU CAN'T HAVE A HIP-HOP WHO PUTS THE "OMNISCIENT" IN ONEESAN THEN WHAT WAS THE POINT OF ANIME I love her I love her shitty personality how she just blows in and makes fun of people for not being her but occasionally under tightly controlled circumstances we see that she's actually got HELLA chops. Number two is Motoko outta Love Hina which is KINDA CREEPY but when I read Love Hina it was EMINENTLY REASONABLE and that sorta shit gets engraved upon your heart, yanno? Your first anime crush. It's not her fault that she's frozen in ink while I've turned into a monster a monster and it keeps getting stronger Number three Sakurao outta Beautiful Bones she's great she solves mysteries and builds shit outta bones, and named her cat "Ulna" because she loves bones so much what a HUGE nerd Number four Akane Kowata outta Flying Witch, mostly because if I marry into that family I can live in the fuckin chill-ass little town Japan what a nice anime that was. Also any time she showed up, the episode got somehow better, if you can believe that. Number five is Haqua from World God Only Knows! Gotta get some kinda ghost/devil all up in this harem. She's actually a prodigy and is good at her job, I promise. Number six is Megumin outta Konosuba. I don't gotta justify this decision because it is obvious as soon as you watch Konosuba. Is anybody else as good at explosions as she? No. HONORABLE MENTION is Bowel Hunter but I left her on the list because I can't really say much about her character except 1) she is cool with killing people for money and 2) she likes bowels I guess? She cute tho ;)

32: If you could make a game for an anime of your choice, what would it be and why? Geez I don't know how to even begin to answer this question. In my mind, all of 'em are completed stories. What could you even put into a game? It would be a different thing, and I don't know if I'd like it the same. Give me, I don't know, the Attack on Titan dating sim. Let me romance Annie you devils. She deserves better than fuckin Waluigi or whatever his name is.

36: In your opinion, what makes a good anime? "Is it Nichijou." I guess the thing that makes me think the anime is good is when there's little moments that I can call back into my brain at a later date and still reflect on 'em and be like "that was some good shit." Bad anime just kinda slides through your mind like sand through your fingers, right? You watch "I Can't Believe My Little Sister's a D-Cup" or whatever and at the end of the day you can't rememnber anybody's names or anything. It only existed in the moment. But like... the good shit stays with you. And you can talk to other people about the good shit! What makes anime good is the little gems of activity that lodge in your skull. That's my HOT TAKE.

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mostlysignssomeportents · 8 years ago

Text

Gifts for Lovers in the Death Throes of The American Republic

Share a final candle-flicker of joy before the annihilation begins

Barry White: All-Time Greatest Hits / $4: Want to set the mood? Here's the soundtrack your evening needs. — Jason

Such romance. Much feelings. / $5: A Very Doge Valentine Card — Jason

Star Trek: The Original Series Adult Coloring Book / $10: If you are home alone, chances are you'll enjoy this TOS coloring book. — Jason

BookBook laptop covers / $80: Show your loved one that you love them, but don't want to look at their ugly laptop. One of the best looking and feeling laptop covers, BookBook protects your device from a drop. It looks enough like a book you may be able to keep your laptop in the seatback when traveling by air. — Jason

Key Knife / $12: A blade cleverly hidden in a key-shaped handle, which many report having successfully taken through TSA checkpoints — Cory

Unfuck Your Habitat / $13: Unfucker-in-chief Rachel Hoffman has distilled the Unfuck-your-habitat philosophy into a brilliant, breezy book — Cory

Latex Skull Bag / $75: Also available in black and pink, this glow-in-the-dark molded memento mori handbag features a spooky lining and an inside pocket — Cory

Giant Testes Door Knocker / $200: Are you meeting a romantic partner's family for the first time this Christmas and at a loss for a gift idea that will impress them with your suitability as a potential addition to the clan? Look no farther. — Cory

Defenders Mushroom Extract Blend / $35: Say it with shrooms! This is a high-quality Asian medicinal mushroom extract tonic, an exotic blend with purported adaptogenic properties. It may brighten up your brain and help you cope with stress. Chaga, Reishi, Shiitake, Maitake and Turkey Tail. — Xeni

Barefoot Dreams Bamboo wrap / $90: A soft and cozy feminine gift that looks amazing. Depending on the season, usually these are in the $80-$100 range on Amazon . With proper care, they stay fuzzy and fresh for a long time. — Xeni

Jasmine Absolute Essential Oil / $55: An uplifting, hopeful, and romantic scent. Beautiful as a pick me up, or an aphrodisiac. — Xeni

Crystal Ball / $13: Your loved one might need this to see into the future of our country. You may want to buy one for yourself. — Xeni

Lotte Lenya Sings Berlin Theatre Songs / $7: The great bittersweet voice songs of romance, hope, hedonism, and a reminder that life and love endure, even when dark clouds fill our skies — Xeni

Personalized End Grain Chopping Block / $190: This personally engraved chopping block is to die for! As you shall, in the brutal civil war portended by the election of Donald Trump. — Rob

Silver heart pill container pendant / $100: Compartment will fit 6 small antipsychotic pills comfortably.

The Womanizer: comes with a "100% orgasm guarantee": It's not a vibrator. It's a gadget that suckles the clitoris. Vanessa Marin, a licensed psychotherapist specializing in sex therapy, said it "induces powerful orgasms in a shockingly short amount of time." — Mark

Square, lightweight plastic flask from Stanley / $15: Sturdy, multicolored flasks that go around the world with you, perfect for a sneaky V-day cocktail with your sweetie (Previously) — Cory

Laser-cut birchwood landscape rings / $24: Beautiful landscape rings to mix and match from Britain—there are houses, trees and mountains (there's also an acrylic tsunami). Read more — Cory

Sex and Drugs: A Journey Beyond Limits / $25: A classic book of blissed-out altered consciousness by Boing Boing patron saint Robert Anton Wilson. — Mark

Flashing LED Heart Kit / $10: Solder up a special something for your loved one or, better yet, have a romantic maker date and do it yourselves. Ah, love just makes everything glow. — David

Diamond-Accent Pendant Necklace / $80: For those who just need to get the Valentine's Day situation dealt with immediately — Rob

Anatomical Heart Necklace / $48: Designed by Lost Apostle, the heart is white bronze, approximately 3/4" tap, and comes on a gunmetal chain. Also available as a ring! — David

Belgian Darts Set / $120: End grain basswood board, scoring rings separated by hydraulically inserted brass, and polished steel-tipped darts with birch wood barrels and shafts.— Rob

Pilot Vanishing Point retractible nib fountain pen / $140: I love my unique, never leaking Pilot/Namiki Vanishing Point. I have carried it for years and the pen writes as beautifully today as when I bought it. Read More — Jason

Full Body Spandex Lycra Suit / $40: Enjoy a close encounter of the 4th kind with your loved one!

Kawaii Heart Stickers / $5: Five bucks a sheet

Moleskine, Large / $16: For writing romantic slashfic

https://boingboing.net/2017/02/07/gifts-for-lovers-in-the-death.html

16 notes · View notes

scenarios-on-ice · 8 years ago

Text

I am greatly honored that my humble nickname has recieved such praise *bows* (I have the honor to be your obedient hamiltrash)

As for the book, it actually shouldn’t be that difficult to find it and buy it on the internet (I got it as a sort of Christmas present from my parents)! It’s really popular ^^ if it helps, the author’s name is Ron Chernow :)

Yeah, the more I listen to the Hamilton soundtrack the more I start to confuse it with actual history. Like, I see a picture of Thomas Jefferson and automatically my brain goes: “That’s not Jefferson, ew, what are those grey strands on his head, where is the gorgeous fluffy hair he needs” and when I first realized what the real Hercules Mulligan looked like just. Yeah. If you’ve seen a picture of the real Mulligan you’ll know what I mean.

(And while reading the biography I just picture all the cast members in my head and it’s awkward. The book says Hamilton had pretty blue eyes and auburn hair and all I can think of is LMM)

YAS those gifs though. Thank you so much! The one for Yuuri automatically made me think of drunk Yuuri smashing some shot glasses, jumping on a table and bellowing ‘BRRAH BRRAH My NAme Is hErcuLES muLLIGAn’ at the top of his lungs XD and the one for Yurio is perfection (honestly if Viktuuri and Eliza/Ham didn’t fit so well I think Yurio could have been Alex in the Hamilton AU. An even smoller, even angrier version of Alex. Maybe Beka would have been Burr.)

(And regarding the recent message that says Hamilton isn’t completely historically accurate, yeah, that’s kinda right ^^ especially about Aaron Burr, Sir. I haven’t got to the point in the biography yet but I do know that Hamilton met Mulligan way before Laurens and Lafayette. Also that Martha Washington ‘naming her feral tomcat after him(Alex)’ is probably a myth. And of course we’ll never know if Angelica was actually in love with Hamilton. Plus a lot of other little things.

But nobody can say that was LMM’s fault because if he didn’t introduce the #squadgoals trio all together it would have been difficult to do their characters justice later on. There’s only so much you can fit into a roughly 3-hours-long musical after all. Plus Ron Chernow, the author of the biography that started it all, worked with LMM on the musical and while he says he was kinda disappointed with the inaccurate bits he still understood, and he definitely approved of the musical in the end :D)

One last thing: Have you ever heard of In The Heights? It was LMM’s first musical and it’s awesome (it centers around the lives of many different characters living in the neighborhood of Washington Heights). If you listen to the soundtrack you’ll probably have to look up some things because In the Heights has a bit of dialogue in between songs, but you’ll still be able to understand most of the story with just the music :D

Some fun facts:

1: Lin-Manuel Miranda played the MC in this musical too. The MC’s name is Usnavi and he’s an orphaned immigrant from the Caribbean (or to be more specific, the Dominican Republic, but anyone who knows Hamilton will think this sounds familiar)

2: Chris Jackson (Washington’s actor) played Usnavi’s best friend, whose name is Benny.

3: A character named Nina sings the line ‘Just me and the GWB(George Washington Bridge)’. Funny when you realize that Nina’s love interest is Benny (AKA George Washington).

4: This line- “If I win the lottery, you’ll never see me again.” “Damn we’re only joking, stay broke then.”

5: And this one- “Remember the story of your name…it was engraved on a passing ship the day your family came. Your father said, ‘Usnavi- that’s what we’ll name the baby.’" “It really said ‘US Navy’.”

(To be fair though Usnavi was lucky. Like someone on Genius pointed out he could just as easily have been named ‘Usmail’)

6: And this one- “I hear he’s got a very big…taxi!”

The nickname is amazing. I have no words for it.

Oh, I see! Unfortunately, we don’t really buy things from the internet, so I’ll try to find the book somewhere in a library ^^;;

You mean this?

Hahah, I knew about the ‘deep blue’ eyes from listening to satisfied too many times and looking up the lyrics at some point.

Aww, I’m glad you liked them ^^

To be honest, I think Yuuri would do that if he’d had enough to drink hahaha

No, Yurio is so angry, I sometimes forget he’s only 15 years old. He’d be the perfect Alex, only smoler and angrier, just like you said.

I mean, yeah, it is inaccurate, but I stand by what I said, every bit of it, it wouldn’t be as awesome had it been completely accurate. I don’t think they would’ve been able to fit everything into the whole show, had they kept the historical timeline.

Nope, I haven’t heard of it, but I’ll check it out ^^ LMM does love playing orphan immigrants, doesn’t he? Those lines are all amazing XD Especially the US Navy and Taxi ones hahahahahah Imagine being called Usmail...

((Sorry I’m being so irresponsive, I’m a sick again and I have a huge headache >_<))

#evans #tokyo ghoul anon #luna talks #submission

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cvagent2 · 8 years ago

Text

Gifts for Lovers in the Death Throes of The American Republic

Share a final candle-flicker of joy before the annihilation begins: Twitter / Facebook.

Silver heart pill container pendant / $100

Compartment will fit 6 small antipsychotic pills comfortably.

Jasmine Absolute Essential Oil / $55

An uplifting, hopeful, and romantic scent. Beautiful as a pick me up, or an aphrodisiac. - Xeni

Personalized End Grain Chopping Block / $190

This personally engraved chopping block is to die for! As you shall, in the brutal civil war portended by the election of Donald Trump. - Rob

Square, lightweight plastic flask from Stanley / $15

Sturdy, multicolored flasks that go around the world with you, perfect for a sneaky V-day cocktail with your sweetie (Previously) - Cory

The Womanizer: comes with a "100% orgasm guarantee"

It's not a vibrator. It's a gadget that suckles the clitoris. Vanessa Marin, a licensed psychotherapist specializing in sex therapy, said it "induces powerful orgasms in a shockingly short amount of time." - Mark

Barry White: All-Time Greatest Hits / $4

Want to set the mood? Here's the soundtrack your evening needs. - Jason

Defenders Mushroom Extract Blend / $35

Say it with shrooms! This is a high-quality Asian medicinal mushroom extract tonic, an exotic blend with purported adaptogenic properties. It may brighten up your brain and help you cope with stress. Chaga, Reishi, Shiitake, Maitake and Turkey Tail. - Xeni

Key Knife / $12

A blade cleverly hidden in a key-shaped handle, which many report having successfully taken through TSA checkpoints - Cory

src="http://media.boingboing.net/wp-content/uploads/2014/02/mk101.jpg">

Flashing LED Heart Kit / $10

Solder up a special something for your loved one or, better yet, have a romantic maker date and do it yourselves. Ah, love just makes everything glow. - David

Crystal Ball / $13

Your loved one might need this to see into the future of our country. You may want to buy one for yourself. - Xeni

Diamond-Accent Pendant Necklace / $80

For those who just need to get the Valentine's Day situation dealt with immediately, which is everyone, frankly, because we're all going to be obliterated, our atoms blasted onto the winds of space, our ultimate fate no nobler or less magnificent than to become the matter of new stars - Rob

Such romance. Much feelings. / $5

A Very Doge Valentine Card - Jason

Unfuck Your Habitat / $13

Unfucker-in-chief Rachel Hoffman has distilled the Unfuck-your-habitat philosophy into a brilliant, breezy book - Cory

Star Trek: The Original Series Adult Coloring Book / $10

If you are home alone, chances are you'll enjoy this TOS coloring book. - Jason

BookBook laptop covers / $80

Show your loved one that you love them, but don't want to look at their ugly laptop. One of the best looking and feeling laptop covers, BookBook protects your device from a drop. It looks enough like a book you may be able to keep your laptop in the seatback when traveling by air. - Jason

Latex Skull Bag / $75

Also available in black and pink, this glow-in-the-dark molded memento mori handbag features a spooky lining and an inside pocket - Cory

Giant Testes Door Knocker / $200

Are you meeting a romantic partner's family for the first time this Christmas and at a loss for a gift idea that will impress them with your suitability as a potential addition to the clan? Look no farther. - Cory

Lotte Lenya Sings Berlin Theatre Songs / $7

The great bittersweet voice songs of romance, hope, hedonism, and a reminder that life and love endure, even when dark clouds fill our skies - Xeni

Barefoot Dreams Bamboo wrap / $90

A soft and cozy feminine gift that looks amazing. Depending on the season, usually these are in the $80-$100 range on Amazon . With proper care, they stay fuzzy and fresh for a long time. - Xeni

Belgian Darts Set / $120

End grain basswood board, scoring rings separated by hydraulically inserted brass, and polished steel-tipped darts with birch wood barrels and shafts. A perfectly subtle way to prepare your offspring for the generations-long struggle against nameless enemies, in which guns and tanks will be but legendary vestiges of the once-great civilizations of man, spoke of in hushed and revential terms as more darts are carved and sharpened in the fire. - Rob

Laser-cut birchwood landscape rings / $24

Beautiful landscape rings to mix and match from Britain-there are houses, trees and mountains (there's also an acrylic tsunami). Read more - Cory

Sex and Drugs: A Journey Beyond Limits / $25

A classic book of blissed-out altered consciousness by Boing Boing patron saint Robert Anton Wilson. - Mark

src="http://media.boingboing.net/wp-content/uploads/2014/02/heartttt.jpg">

Anatomical Heart Necklace / $48

Pilot Vanishing Point retractible nib fountain pen / $140

I love my unique, never leaking Pilot/Namiki Vanishing Point. I have carried it for years and the pen writes as beautifully today as when I bought it. Read More - Jason

Full Body Spandex Lycra Suit / $40

Enjoy a close encounter of the 4th kind with your loved one!

Kawaii Heart Stickers / $5

Five bucks a sheet

Moleskine, Large / $16

For scrawling the final secrets of humanity by the light of a smog-veiled and uncertain sun, the recollections of a lover long-lost yet clung to amid the vast and shearing weight of death and war. And maybe a bit of saucy slashfic too! - Rob

Note that however sexy it may be, an Inflatable Tyrannosaurus Rex Costume will not fit in a bug-out bag.

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